In an increasingly disenfranchised world, many of us feel cut off from a true connection to ourselves. One of the reasons is that we exist in a world dominated by patriarchy where the masculine rules and the feminine is rejected. When I say, ‘masculine’ and ‘feminine’, I am not referring to qualities related to genders. Rather, I am talking about energies.
Within us all, resides a mix of feminine and masculine energies that are entrenched in our psyches. The yin and the yang. The masculine energies are often focused on ‘doing’ and ‘pushing’. The perspective of life and decision making only allows room for logic and reason. Emotions and intuition are discounted. The reality is that we all have both of these opposing energies within us. And due to a constant repression of the feminine, we feel disconnected. So what are some ways we can reclaim the feminine, not just as women but humans?
Unlearning the effects of patriarchy
The more we become aware of the historical impacts of patriarchy, we can start to unlearn them. This could be something as profound as making room for mysticism in a hyper empirical world, to noticing our own emotional reactions, such as, if we are about to cry and then we stop ourselves because we think it makes us weak.
As we become more reliant on our technology, we lose our connection to our intuition. This is a potent source of inner knowledge that we all have, yet this is dismissed as women’s nonsense. Our intuition can speak to us through our bodies, feelings or thoughts. Strengthen your intuitive muscle by learning how it speaks to you and listen to its guidance.
Tuning into body wisdom
When we are imbalanced in our male energy, we may be prone to pushing our body, setting rigid expectations of ourselves and thus, burning out. Our bodies know when we need rest or nourishment. Allow the sensations of your body to guide you and tell you what it needs.
Embracing the spectrum of emotions
We are often expected to ignore our difficult emotions and embrace positivity. As humans, it is only natural for us to feel a whole spectrum of emotions – both positive and negative. Allow yourself to feel sad or angry, that is the only way those emotions will be released. Stop ignoring your difficult emotions, rather accept and embrace them.
Our abilities to have meaningful relationships with others is hugely dependent on the ability to be vulnerable with someone else. To share the intimate details of our soul. Yet, this is discouraged and casual, meaningless relationships are the norm. Vulnerability opens us up to our humanity and thus, forges true connection. Learn to be vulnerable with those who are deserving.
Accepting the seasons of life
When we embrace our current season of life, we can flow more easily rather than pushing or trying to force something to happen. This means tuning into our current levels of energies, the cycles of nature and the cosmos. Start to align more with the lunar cycle and embrace the change of seasons in your own life.
Learning to love and nurture
The most important relationship we have is the one with ourselves. If the relationship is based on fear, this will show up in our own relational patterns as we live out our fears. As we improve our relationship to ourselves, by listening to our intuition, making aligned choices and drawing boundaries, we can actually deepen trust and create more harmonious relationships.
Rituals bring meaning to our lives through invisible threads of connection. Rituals can also become a powerful tool in embracing your feminine self. Cleanse your space. Meditate every morning in the sun. Journal. Honor the full and new moons. Or find a ritual that is resonant for you.
Treating the womb as sacred
Feminine energy can also be very sexual and erotic, and in fact our womb space is also the seat of our creativity. When we treat the womb as sacred, we are also more discerning about whom we share our sexual energy with and how. We can also treat menstruation as a special time of the month and allow our bodies to rest and recharge.
Venturing into the unknown
The yin energy is dark, it is associated with mysteries, the night and the moon. Uncertainty brings about a primal fear and so we prefer to do things on autopilot. However, in that darkness and in that fear is also infinite potential. When we surrender to nothingness, is when we can rebirth our consciousness and shed the parts of ourselves that we have outgrown.
The more we accept this duality within ourselves of the masculine and feminine, can we feel more centered and whole. An imbalance of feminine energies can also manifest as codependency in relationships, passivity and inaction, or oversensitivity. We must also remember that there are light and shadow to us all, and just as there is ‘toxic masculinity’, there is also something known as the ‘dark feminine.’
That is a topic for another day. But remember that our intuition, our empathy, our receptivity and nurturance are some of our greatest gifts, not to be demonised or hidden. To reclaim our feminine, we must become more intimate with these wilder parts of ourselves. Published first on Ice Today.